I was rummaging through my vast collection of files and came across a little piece called “The Bridge from Here to Happiness”. A quirky title. I liked it. But unfortunately, it was only the first 3 paragraphs here. I decided to finish it up.
Here you go…
The Bridge From Here To Happiness
For many years I’ve been fascinated by the theme of what an optimum or ideal human being might look like. How would such a person behave? What admirable traits would make them an exemplar for the best-lived life? How would they lead — and with what qualities?
In times past, ideal human beings were often judged on religious merit. Following prescribed codes, no matter the cost to oneself or others, was considered the highest calling. Saints, ascetics, and martyrs stood as role models, and emulation of them was seen as noble. Few would have been able to embrace that much self-sacrifice, but the cultural climate framed such devotion as the pinnacle of human aspiration.
Today, very few people look to martyrdom or extreme sacrifice as a model of human excellence. If anything, our definitions of the “ideal” have swung to the opposite end of the spectrum. Watching modern television and so-called reality shows, one might conclude that the figures most admired are those with money, physical attractiveness, and a knack for sarcastic, even harsh, judgment. The influencers of our era are often not exemplars of inner strength or wisdom, but rather people skilled at self-promotion.
Fortunately, the idea that celebrity alone is the highest good has been exposed as shallow. We have seen too many examples of famous people living miserable, destructive lives. Wealth and notoriety have not prevented the downward spiral of countless actors, musicians, and social media stars. Addiction, family collapse, loneliness, and early death have revealed that fame is not a reliable bridge to happiness.
This leaves us with an important question: if religious sainthood and empty celebrity are not the models of the ideal life, what is? What does a truly admirable human being look like in our time, and how do they show us a path toward real happiness?
To answer this, it helps to step back and think about what qualities consistently produce better outcomes — not just in wealth or prestige, but in well-being, relationships, and contribution to society.
Research in psychology and sociology points to a set of traits that appear again and again: emotional regulation, empathy, resilience, a sense of meaning, and the ability to form strong, healthy connections. Unlike religious sainthood, these are not about denying the self; unlike shallow celebrity, they are not about aggrandizing the self. They are about balancing individual flourishing with service to others.
An “ideal” person today is not flawless or superhuman, but they do have recognizable qualities:
• Self-awareness: They understand their strengths and weaknesses without denial or self-deception.
• Compassion: They are able to consider the perspective of others and extend care beyond their immediate circle.
• Integrity: Their actions are consistent with their values, even when inconvenient.
• Adaptability: They can navigate stress and change without collapsing or lashing out destructively.
• Contribution: They put effort into making things better for their community, workplace, or family, not just themselves.
These are not abstract ideals; studies show that such traits correlate with greater life satisfaction, stronger relationships, and even better physical health.
Why integrity and empathy matter more than brilliance or beauty
In earlier eras, people might have argued that the ideal human was the most intelligent, the most beautiful, or the most powerful. Today we see that intelligence without empathy can be destructive; beauty without depth can be empty; and power without responsibility can devastate lives.
Integrity — the ability to align behavior with core values — is more predictive of trust and respect than raw talent. People admire those who keep their word, not simply those who are clever. Similarly, empathy is the trait that allows societies to function cooperatively. Leaders who lack empathy may gain control temporarily but inevitably destabilize their institutions.
It is worth noting that people high in empathy and integrity are often not flashy. They may never trend on social media or dominate headlines. But they are remembered as trustworthy friends, effective colleagues, and caring family members. If the goal is a meaningful and happy life, these quieter virtues turn out to be much more important than charisma or wealth.
The role of resilience and adaptability
No one lives a perfect life free of setbacks. The real test of character is how someone responds when difficulties come. Resilience — the capacity to recover from adversity — has become one of the most studied psychological strengths of our time.
Resilient people are not those who never feel pain or fear, but those who do not become permanently defined by them. They find ways to grow through challenge. They learn, adapt, and use hardship as fuel for deeper perspective.
An ideal human being today, then, is not someone who never suffers but someone who transforms suffering into insight. This capacity not only benefits them but also gives them credibility when they support others through difficulties. Resilience connects directly to happiness because it prevents the collapse into despair when circumstances turn bad.
Contribution as a defining trait
Perhaps the most important reframe is this: the ideal human being is not simply focused on personal fulfillment. Contribution — giving back, serving, leaving things better than they were found — emerges as a crucial factor.
The Harvard Study of Adult Development, one of the longest-running studies on human well-being, has repeatedly shown that relationships and contribution to community are the strongest predictors of health and happiness. People who invest in meaningful connections and give to others do not just live longer; they report greater satisfaction in life.
Thus, the ideal person is not someone who isolates in pursuit of private pleasure, but someone who invests in others while maintaining their own balance. Happiness arises less from accumulation and more from connection and contribution.
The bridge to happiness
So how does this all connect to the search for happiness? The bridge is built from qualities that create sustainable well-being. We know from decades of research that material wealth beyond basic security contributes little to happiness. After survival needs are met, it is relationships, integrity, meaning, and contribution that create enduring satisfaction.
The ideal human being, then, is not a saint or a celebrity, but a person who cultivates qualities that serve both self and others. They live in alignment with values, navigate hardship with resilience, form healthy connections, and contribute to something larger than themselves.
This is the bridge from here to happiness. It is not built overnight, nor is it a fixed destination. It is a way of living that steadily improves the quality of life for the individual and the community around them.
Conclusion: moving toward the ideal
Most of us will never be saints or celebrities. That’s good news, because those models were never reliable bridges to happiness anyway. Instead, we can aim to become people who embody empathy, integrity, resilience, and contribution.
This redefinition of the ideal person is not abstract or unattainable. It is grounded in science, demonstrated in ordinary lives, and available to anyone willing to cultivate it. If more of us stepped into this model — even imperfectly — our societies would be healthier, our relationships stronger, and our personal lives more fulfilling.
The ideal human being is not a perfect figure on a pedestal. The ideal human being is simply one who lives with enough wisdom and compassion to cross the bridge from self-centered striving to shared flourishing. That bridge is the one that actually leads us to happiness.
Joy to you all,
Prof. Keith Scott-Mumby
The Official Alternative Doctor
Sources:
Fredrickson, B. L. (2001). The role of positive emotions in positive psychology: The broaden-and-build theory of positive emotions. American Psychologist, 56(3), 218–226. https://doi.org/10.1037/0003-066X.56.3.218
Southwick, S. M., & Charney, D. S. (2012). Resilience: The science of mastering life’s greatest challenges. New York, NY: Cambridge University Press.
Vaillant, G. E. (2002). Aging well: Surprising guideposts to a happier life from the landmark Harvard Study of Adult Development. Boston, MA: Little, Brown and Company.
Waldinger, R. J., & Schulz, M. S. (2010). What’s love got to do with it? Social functioning, perceived health, and daily happiness in married octogenarians. Psychology and Aging, 25(2), 422–431. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0019087
Waldinger, R. J. (2015, November). What makes a good life? Lessons from the longest study on happiness [Video]. TEDxBeaconStreet. https://www.ted.com/talks/robert_waldinger_what_makes_a_good_life_lessons_from_the_longest_study_on_happiness
