I always cringe a bit with the gratitude seekers. It’s a semantic thing; we agree on what we are each looking for. I just don’t think of gratitude.
I prefer to think in terms of seeking the good in everything. Not QUITE the same as gratitude. But there is always something good in your day, no matter how bad and frustrating it seems.
If you can learn to focus on the good things and not the problems, you’re halfway to heaven! If you want to call that gratitude, you have my blessing!
Happiness isn’t really about a ridiculously ideal state, where you have “everything you want” or other such unreal notions. It’s about the process of living – extracting as much worth out of your circumstances as you can.
In that sense it doesn’t matter if you are rich or broke: happiness is working with what you’ve got.
The belief that getting rich will bring you happiness is a delusion for fools. There are many rich and miserable people who sold themselves out in the pursuit of dollars.
However, I am not a wealth nihilist. I just paint a different picture: it’s the search, the JOURNEY to wealth that brings happiness. If riches is really what you want, then living the life of a seeker of wealth can be very pleasurable. Overcoming the many obstacles in your path can be very satisfying and fulfilling. You just need to make sure there are enough “wins” to keep you cheerful.
Researchers Robert Emmons and Michael McCullough looked into the value of gratitude. The results were plain as day. In an experimental comparison, those who kept gratitude journals on a weekly basis exercised more regularly, reported fewer physical symptoms, felt better about their lives as a whole, and were more optimistic about the upcoming week compared to those who recorded hassles or neutral life events.
Also, interestingly, they reported that doing this seemed to make attaining goals easier. Participants who kept gratitude lists were more likely to have made progress toward important personal goals (academic, interpersonal and health-based) over a two-month period compared to subjects in the other experimental conditions.
Maybe you should start a gratitude journal for yourself, especially now, in gloomy times. Each night, before you go to sleep, write down 5 things that you have cause to be grateful for. These don’t have to be really “big deal” things; a nice meal or a kiss are just as valid.
My point is that WHATEVER happened, there would be some good in it. Find the good!
If you are in a relationship, it can be great for the two of you to do this together. True insight into what brings joy to your partner is one of the most valuable social skills you can cultivate.
SOURCE:
Emmons, R.A., & McCullough, M.E. (2003). Counting blessings versus burdens: Experimental studies of gratitude and subjective well-being. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 84, 377-389
I’ve always had a problem with the word ‘gratitude’; it smacks of some kind of lack or dependency on an outside source. How about substituting with ‘appreciation’? It makes a huge difference when you walk around appreciating all that you can. You can also ‘appreciate’ those who you couldn’t feel grateful to in a million years!
Yes, “gratitude”, “appreciation”, “thankfullness”, “seeking the good in everything” are all the same to me; it is a true state of peace that makes us feel happy, healthy and calm.
Today, I would like to show my gratitude to Dr. Keith for posting such a valuable lesson about “gratitude” to teach the World–this lesson is the most gentle, natural, yet most effective tonic medicine that Dr. Keith offered freely to us in order to protect us from our daily chaos. May God support and protect Dr. Keith in all good intentions that he makes! May Dr. Keith be healthy, peaceful, and have a long meaningful life! May all Dr. Keith’s loved ones be safe and never get lost! May Dr. Keith’s compassion never stop growing, reaching all those in need in this Universe in the most gentle efficient way!
It is so true that after I show my sincere gratitude towards someone, something, or some situation, a feeling of peace, release, independence, and warmness runs into my spine, giving me a clear view for my precious day.
May you all have gratitude to yourself, to your masters, teachers, carers, supporters, parents, Gods, family and non-family members, all living things that you love and hate, all living things around you, inside you, above you, below you, and far away from you!
This is one the best post I have seen on this topic in a long time. Thank you for this, and for citing Emmons (The Psychology of Gratitude is such a great book, with not hard empiricle data to back these ideas that are sometimes seen as ‘hokey’).
I would like to share a site with you and your readers, imsothankful.com — it is a great tool to put your gratitide/appreciation out for the public to see. I think by doing this it has to snowball and grow exponentially. I know when I click over and view other users messages, i leave feeling touched and enthused to love all that is in my life.
Its free and easy, so if you get a chance take a look. Would love to hear (read) your thoughts on this amazing new way..
Jess